2011年8月21日星期日

中女是男人的標籤

因為捧友人彭晴場看《中女解毒》,這個一度沈寂了的話題,又在友儕間熱了起來。

男女,通常大不同。而我沒想到的是,當中女很介意淪為嫁不出的女人,原來,男人比女人對中女現象介意一百倍。

「你們以為『中女』是對女性的標籤?其實真正被標籤的,是我們──男人。社會憑甚麼以為我們比不上三高女性 ?憑甚麼認為男人都被能幹的女人搶盡風頭? 憑甚麼認為現代女人樣樣比男人強? 」男性友人,嘩啦嘩啦說。

是吧?每個中女的出現,都是對男性的一大侮辱。打在中女身、痛在男人心。如果恨嫁是中女的死穴,自卑該不會是男性最最最大的盲點?

都說最介意男女差距的,其實是男不是女。很多中女,根本不介意男人及不上自己。女人愛你,就是把你當寶了。其他條件,壓根兒沒放心上。她最介意的,是為什麼男人要這麼介意她介不介意。

黃宇詩在《中女解毒》裡說,千錯萬錯,錯在父母都把女兒訓練得獨立自強。天曉得最受男生歡迎的,其實是甚麼都不會的公主。

貫徹這個思路想下去,噢,懂了。我們不要精益求精,只愛海軍鬥水兵。你不夠高,我也設法調低一點來遷就你。先別說男女關係,一個社會如此運作下去,會變成甚麼樣子?

我比較抗拒「女人要扮蠢」的說法,但我相信真正聰明的人,會懂得找令別人舒服的時機和方法去提示對方甚麼。男人,其實都渴望有個能幹的賢內助,不過最好同時也能體貼他的面子。

如果中女要學的,不是扮蠢,而是為對方「多設想一點」。相反,男人要檢討的,正是自己有否「諗多咗」。甩開自卑的心魔,全情投入去愛你所愛,中女與中佬,早己白頭到老。

6 則留言:

匿名 說...

正確的說法是自尊, 不是自卑, 連最後擁有的,也放棄了, 中佬如何見江東父老呢!

尊尼

匿名 說...

中女在職場可怕之處,在於她們有無限的時間,沒有了家庭的時間負擔,在同一條件下,中女當然可以做得更多更好。

匿名 說...

自尊和自卑,或許有關聯,但總是兩樣不同的東西(eg 前者較中性、是noun,後者較負面、是feeling)

我是男人,老實說,另一半比自己能幹(尤是經濟能力),在江東父老面前,我感到的絕對是自卑,而非自尊。

隨風 說...

男人認下自卑會唔會好d?

如果女性有"下嫁"既心態, 唔好意思,請繼續等

或者唱下 ”等了又等”

熱血宅男 說...

好到point~

Frostig 說...

I have JUST recently realised that, 自卑 is a common, critical, major problem of Chinese males, believe or not.

Perhaps all guys are like that, but I don't know as many foreigners as Chinese, so I can't make any conclusion. But anyway, my point is, it IS so true that Chinese guys feels so lack of confidence and inferior, which has caused SOOOOO many relation problems between couples.

Worst of all is that, those guys might even deny such facts (and thus unwilling to face and tackle the problem). For me, to have self-confidence does not mean to be a superman, but just to KNOW what you can or cannot do, to know your own capabilities and limitations, etc. But it seems that in our culture, males have been trained or taught to 'be strong', so they tend to learn to deny their own weaknesses, at the end causing them to feel inferior when they, one day, come to discover their own weaknesses, or even just to realise that they HAVE got weaknesses......

I feel terrible about this phenomenon and hate dealing with such people! But they seem to be the 'norm' in our Chinese society, unfortunately!!!

:-(